Playing with Proximity in your Practices (1/3)
A 3 part series of letters reflecting on space and time.
Dear Doula,
This will be a 3 part letter. As we re-establish our communication on a new platform, I felt inspired to approach a topic that I’ve been thinking about and writing about over this year.
noun: nearness in space, time, or relationship.
The pandemic provided an abrupt re-introduction to the theme of proximity in my life. I began thinking about and meditating on ideas of proximity when the concepts of time and space were introduced into my personal processes and relationships.
My mantra for 2020: “time and space are the medicine”
I began to notice all of the moments in life when time feels fluid, stretched, manipulated and different. My mind created time for deep study in moments of patience, discomfort, labor, laughter, orgasm. Moments in life where your proximity to time and to an experience seems gooey. My fascination with liminal spaces occured as the world began to “shut down” and I was also in the midst of experimenting with time and space in relationships. As someone who works and plays with bodies, sound and touch, my new playground was finding unique ways to continue to connect with changes in proximity.
This series of letters are a collection of thoughts, messages and lessons that I’ve recorded in the last couple of years as a result of this “proximity self study,” and will outline how I’ve noticed proximity play into our work and practices.
As Doulas, we tune into flow and appreciate the power of “flow states”. In the study of proximity in my life, I noticed that there is a flow that exists inside of a practice, but also a flow in your proximity to a practice.
Much of my work involves bringing sacred ritual into a realm of realistic reach for us every day; bringing the reverence of ceremony and receiving its benefits in practical ways throughout our life. When I host weekly classes, whether the practice is yoga, tarot, journaling etc. I often receive “confessions” from my community that sound like “It’s been forever since I even unrolled my yoga mat”, “I have been adamant about showing up to class because it’s the only time I make to journal,” “I haven’t sat at my altar in a week.” In a continued effort to decolonize our minds and our rituals, I recognize that capitalism encourages not only continued productivity but consistency without providing sustainability. Habits, rituals, structure and tradition all rely on devotional sustainability, and a ruthless expectation of consistency without the consideration of sustainability is a piece of internalized capitalism I try to encourage unsubscribing from.
Many of you know I am against any temptation to “make yourself wrong” in any practice. I feel that it is counter productive to any process of growth and even self accountability. In shifting this lens, and recognizing a shift in our practice, I have learned to identify these moments as a play with proximity to the practice, a necessary break, information or data to encourage more attention to ourselves.
Have you been incredibly busy over the last month? Have you found alternate ways to regulate, practice and decompress? Has your spirit and and your body been called to something different? Did this space from your practice provide a different integration? There are many ways that introducing space and time can be a gift to the practice and to you.
I saw this in Doula practices as well over “the great pause”. People in my community having conflicting feelings creating distance and playing with proximity with their clients, with certain aspects of their work. I see this as a healthy flow, and one that creates sustainability.
I’m wondering how many of you found a shift in your work in the last 2 years. Maybe you began focusing on a new aspect of Doula work, or you had to increase or decrease the amount of clients you accepted.
Playing with proximity to your Doula practice is a key tool in adapting for sustainability, whether it’s intentional or not, whether it’s calculated or coincidence.
Tune in, notice where distance is naturally created. Notice where you are drawn to get closer. Notice where proximity shift show up and greet them with compassion and curiosity.
More soon.
Xo,
Scout
What I’m vibin with this week:
🥦 It’s a rainy and cold weekend, and I’m looking forward to creating simplicity in the kitchen and nourishing my body creatively. Im going to try this simple broccoli and cauliflower recipe. Have you tried something like this?
🎧 What’s playing in the background: